i love being in people’s dreams
well unless i get killed or something
Once my friend had a dream that there was a serial killer at our school and everyone went behind bulletproof glass but I got distracted by a butterfly and got killed
Also, Black Widow accomplished all of it without being a billionaire.
And without being a moody-ass shit.
This was the most important moment in America’s next top model
Someone took pictures of us sticking boob inserts onto our hotel window then driving over them with a Donkey Kong monster truck
never let this die
I just found the best Facebook page
Remember when Romney lost the election so somebody created White People Mourning Romney and collected various people crying over Romney’s loss?
"this baby came out of you but im not 100% sure its yours"
Funny thing - a woman who applied for welfare after her husband left her hadto supply DNA evidence he was actually the father. The results: he was definitely the father, but she wasn’t the mother. Her children were removed from her custody and she was sued for fraud, even though she insisted they were her children.
Turns out, she wasn’t a surrogate or a kidnapper (the two most obvious explanations) - she was a chimera. As an embryo, she fused at a very early stage with her twin, forming one individual. Her ovaries apparently developed from cells that had originally belonged to her vanished twin. Later on more tests showed that while the woman’s skin and hair DNA did not match her childrens, DNA taken from her cervix did.
WHAT THE FUCk
This went from stupid to really interesting in point 5 seconds.
So I was travelling and I had a backpack with me which had a notebook, my purse, a bottle of coke and like 2 maxi pads for vagina reasons
After travelling for a few hours I reached into my bag to grab my purse and it was sticky and the unopened coke bottle was empty
I was feeling my bag expecting a pool of coke at the bottom and why it hadn’t leaked out of my bag and it turns oUT MY MAXI PADS ABSORBED AN ENTIRE FUCKING BOTTLE OF COKE
#just girly things
Let’s talk about men who send woman unsolicited pictures of their penis. I don’t believe that any man does this and thinks to themselves, “wow, she’s going to see this picture of my amazing dick and totally want to have sex with me.”
Men send woman unsolicited pictures of their penis because they get a wicked little thrill out of violating women. It’s a form of non-consensual sexual aggression, and it’s fucked up.
the SADDEST thing ever in an anime is when the most cool and collected character who always has their poker face on has a huge emotional breakdown and they let all of their emotions out and they’re just screaming and crying like there is nothing more upsetting than that do you understand
YES I GOOGLED HOW TO TAKE A SCREEN SHOT FIGHT ME
what if the new animal species we discover each year are actually being dropped off by aliens? like they have an over abundance of yeti crabs or something and so they brought some to earth because they knew we’d get a kick out of this
This is the cutest conspiracy theory I’ve ever heard
China always gets the best lines in all of Hetalia (dub)
- "White people, sheesh"
- "SUCK BALL!!! I KNEW FORTUNE COOKIE WAS BAD LUCK!!!"
- "It is a matter of gay or death"
- "Spom? Snackers?! WE DIE OF TYPE TWO DIABETES BEFORE WE DIE OF STARVATION"
- "It seem simple enough, China take all, you can go home now"
- "You an ass"
- "A GIRAFFE, A HIDEOUS FREAK OF NATURE!"
- "I AM TIRED OF GETTING ORDERED AROUND ALL DAMN TIME"
- "I will draw all of the portraits from now on"
- "Everything I could ever want can be found right in the depths of my own heart… except for money."
- "THEY CALL IT A COPY RIGHT BECAUSE YOU DO NOT HAVE RIGHT TO COPY"
- "IT IS ORIGINAL CHINESE IDEA"
- "WHAT THE HELL TOOK YOU SO LONG"
- "Why can’t you dominate your people with a totalitarian government, seriously"
- "WHAT YOU DO TO PANDA?!?!?!"
- "WHO ARE YOU?!?! GO AWAY, NOW!"
- "Sorry I am late, I was making a drunken crab dish, and my cultural appetite makes me neither sorry, nor regretful"
- "How to get fat in a famine, you can also try our tea, makes your colon slippery"
- "We should stick together, even if we hate it. I hate it"
- "why should I die because of stupid Japan and scary story"